Recently I had a conversation with a group of friends. The topic may seem strange but we were discussing what we would do if our partners died. When you have children it is something that crosses your mind every now and then. Amazingly, most of us said we would remain in The Valley with the kids on our own. Before last year I would not have said this, now I do. I know that the community around me would support me through thick and thin. I know what real communities do for each other.
I am not a 'group' type of person. I have a few close friends and many acquaintances. I traditionally have never 'belonged' to anything other than a gym.
Last year when my life hit crisis point, my family and I were in desperate need of help. Like most daughters I called upon my Mum who willing offered to help us whatever way she could. I figured this would be all the help we would get.
Of course the hospitalisation was the crisis. We decided we would muddle through and take it as it came. After only a few days we kept receiving persistent requests from a group of friends wanting to help us. They approached Frank and my Mum and a plan was hatched.
Slowly but surely a roster was built, volunteer after volunteer put up their hand to help. I asked if they realised what they were planning to do and how long they'd be doing it. The reply was relax all will be fine, don't worry we will do it.
Sitting in hospital I watched it unfold. This group of women took charge.Each time when my Mum went home for some much needed rest for a week or two, the roster ladies took control.
In the morning a lady would arrive and gather up the mountain of washing and take it home. In the evening she'd return with the laundry washed, dried and folded plus a freshly cooked dinner for my family as well.
Frank would tell me stories of how these women went out of their way to help us. A couple of times some put us first before their own families and needs.
I wondered how I would repay these ladies who had helped us at the time. On the roster were women I barely knew.
As I sat in my city hospital I knew if we lived there it would never have happened. My city visitors were struggling to just to visit me. Yet our community here in The Valley rallied around us and carried us through until I returned home. Tirelessly helping and never complaining.
The most beautiful part was there was only thank you was required. I am not indebted to my community, I do not need to repay but merely pay it forward. I know we were truly blessed by our community.
When I look outside my world and see and hear of other's lives and stories I know this is not always the case. On the Internet in the many connecting places where communities are formed, I find families struggling at their times of need. With cyber space as the only support.
Yes, we were truly blessed on the community help part of our side trip. I believe we should all pitch in when we can, even if it is a tiny little thing you find you can do, it will always be remembered.
That is what a community is all about.
Merry Christmas to all,
Cathryn xo
