I've found myself with little to say at present. I'm not writing, blogging, updating my status often or tweeting. I feel I have nothing to say. My only real answer to all this is fear. I'm fearful of the next step I think. I don't know what to do about it. I'm fearful that if I finish my book I will then need to pursue it further but it also fear that people will not want to read it. I know of so many more inspiring stories than mine,stories of people who have faced so much more than I.
When I used to write I'd pour my heart out and say how it truly felt. Now when I attempt writing I am guarded and concerned. I think can I really admit that or tell people this.
My book is practically written now with lots of editing work to be done. It sits awaiting my return.
I have sat and thought about the fear I felt when faced with my predicament two years ago. I know I drew strength from the love of my bless-ed family and friends to get me through. Some days I sat and looked out the hospital window imagining the love from everyone outside pouring in to support me. I'd wrap it around me and feel comforted.
This is a new challenge I am facing now. This time the love to conquer the fear needs to come from within me. I need to love myself and believe in myself on a whole new level so I can step up and accomplish my dream.
Love- it is that simple and that difficult!
Cathryn
