Bed Rested-The Reverse Premmie

Most premature babies spend time in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) or the Special Care Nursery (SCN) for days, weeks, or even months. But sometimes it is the mother who does the long hospital stay. I call it Reverse Premmie as I was the one who was months in hospital on bed rest. 'Resting' trying to keep Tia safe inside for as long as possible.

At the start with my admittance to hospital at 19 weeks it was to give her a chance for a life. Then from 24 weeks 'resting' in hospital was to keep Tia from the micro premmie world. Finally, we aimed for 34 weeks gestation where health concerns and problems would be a lower risk if born at or after this time.

Tia and I were lucky. We made it to the premature stage of 34 weeks with me having 'rested' for three and a half months before she was born. This did not mean that all went smoothly after Tia's birth as Tia had to be admitted to the NICU for breathing problems then a further 2 weeks in the SCN to establish breastfeeding and for her to manage some weight gain but this outcome is far better than the 19 week outcome.

Today I am blogging to Fight For Premmies but for me it is more than this. Today I think of not only the tiny babies struggling for life and good health in the NICUs but I am also thinking of the mums on bed rest. The mums 'resting' to give their child an extra week, day, hour or even a minute inside their womb- the most natural incubator in the world.

I have included an excerpt from my book.It is still a little unpolished but I wanted to share it with you.

14/03/08

Three days in and what a bumpy ride. The first 2 days were endless phone calls and text messages.

The first afternoon I couldn't stop. I couldn't keep still. I was trying to sit around and read magazines like this happens everyday but I would get to the last page and not recall a word I had read. My first night was pure hell. Noisy bright room, I woke up with every noise. I wrote lists for Frank, my Mum, and my kids.

I wrote my boys and Harmony a letter. How do you tell them you aren't coming home for months? I told them that I love them and to be good for whoever is looking after them. What more could I say?

I took forever to get undressed and into pyjamas, and even longer to unpack my bags. A midwife came into my room, nearly tripping over my bags. She asked me if I wanted her to unpack them.

“No, I will,” I told her, “when I am ready. When I am no longer in denial.”

The next day I had the most shocking headache. There were concerns that it was the medication but I think it was stress. I could barely move my head. My neck and shoulders seized up. It is probably from the sudden lack of use. The physio came and worked on it for me and showed me stretches to do to loosen it up. I also have a nice heat pack to help. So the headaches are gone. I think maybe the medication was a small part of the problem but my body has adjusted now.

I am struggling with tiredness and having naps throughout the day. It could be a way of coping- if I just go to sleep when I wake up I may not be here anymore. Unfortunately when the fatigue goes I know the boredom is going to set in and boredom is going to be hard to beat.

My thoughts are scary. Keeping my mind off what may happen and making your thoughts about what you want and believe will happen is a tough job in itself. You can't admit to yourself that you are scared- you have to believe everything is going to turn out perfect.

My kids are struggling. Jenson is reaching out, Caelen has crumbled and I don't know about Mac, he hasn't reacted yet. Harmony just tells people that Mummy is gone.

It is so crazy. I don't want to be here alone. It kills me when I speak to them on the phone. Tears and tears on both ends of the line. I will see them on Sunday. The last time I saw them I said I would come home as I kissed them goodbye at the school gate. I promised I’d come home and I didn't. When I see them this time I will be saying the goodbye, asking them to be strong and stay safe.

I don't think I can do it.



Here in Australia as in many countries the major hospitals with the NICUs are in the larger cities so this often means mothers and babies are separated from their loved ones, families and their support networks for days, weeks and months. For me, my bed rest meant I was hundreds of kilometres away from my family. Prematurity affects so many people on so many levels.

If it wasn't for modern science and bed rest Tia and I would not be here today. I knew my Bless-ed Baby would be early. I know why she came early. So many mothers don't know it is going to happen and never know why. We need to support organisations so they can keep researching and find the answers to why these babies are born to have to fight for life. Lets work together to make more people aware of the premmie babies, their families, friends and communities. As they should not be facing this alone.

Support March of Dimes or the leading premmie foundation in your country.

Bless-ed Bed Rest Mums and your Bless-ed Babies you are in my thoughts today and everyday.

Thank you for reading this on Fight For Premmies Day.

Cathryn